Becky

I got an internship as a stitcher at Pacific Conservatory of Performing Arts! it is in Santa Maria, CA. The downfall to it is that I leave for europe on like may 24th or so. i fly back on june 9 and have to essentially grab the rest of my stuff and fly to california the same day or the next. it goes until august 29th. the sad part is that i'm going to have to be away from john for the summer. im going to miss him so much. im so happy when im with him.

im also going to have to either try to find a place to live where they allow cats or i'm going to have to leave kona at my aunts' house.

but all in all, it is going to be a great experience.

I'm really happy lately. I just thought I'd let you all know.


AND, Leane came to visit me for a night :)! that was happy too.

well, according to livejournal its been 61 weeks since my last livejournal post, but leane said she wanted me to post something, so i thought i'd give a very brief update of my life.

as far as school goes, i have one more semester left. i only have two classes to attend and an independent study. the independent study (senior project) is basically taking projects that ive done in the past few years and finalizing them for my portfolio. i will take my portfolio to usitt in march, which is basically a big conference where i will most likely walk away with job offers. after the regular semester i plan on going to england and paris for a class trip. it is a class that i have already taken, but i can take it as an advanced research class so that i can go. it should be fun. i really need to finish my application and turn it in.

for those that don't know i have been working in the costume shop in the theatre for over a year now. i love it. for as much of a pain in the ass control freak my boss is who yells at us all the time, i really like working there. ive worked every run crew for every show in the past 3 years and i think ive found that i absolutely love being on wardrobe crew. if i join the stagehands union, that's what i want to do is wardrobe crew.

i have a new boy in my life. very new actually...i met him like 3 weeks ago at barley & hopps (the bar i go to ALL the time). he was talking to me across the bar, telling me i should join my friend caitlin in her dancing on the bar. at barclose he came over and gave me his phone number. i texted him later that night and then...yea. his name is johnny. he is 27 and was a film student at uwo. he's taking some time off school to save up some money to finish school. he loves musicals more than i do. when i introduced him to carter they had an 1+ hour conversation about star wars and comic books, so he fits in nicely there. carter gave me his seal of approval, so thats a good sign.

i suppose that is what is most important in my life at the moment. this entry is probably long enough for right now.

i <3 leane!

went home for thanksgiving. my parents hate my lip ring. i saw the tenacious d movie. its sunday night and i got a little drunk w/ my roommates...just a little though. kona is playing with a toy mouse in my room...and she's super cute and soft. i can still feel the warmness from the goldschlagger.

these were just some random thoughts that were in my head that i thought id write down cuz i havent updated in a long time.

im so unhappy right now. i feel so left out of my own house. thats not how its supposed to be. we should all be having fun together. i feel like everyone is mad at me all the time and i dont know why. i feel so left out of everything. its not one thing, its a lot of little things. yesterdy if i hadn't have come home i wouldnt have even known until it was too late that they were carving pumpkins. no one bothered to call and ask if i was going to be home. i know that sounds dumb. but i was upset and sad.

its not supposed to be like this. its supposed to be the time of our lives. why is it like this?

When a girl bumps into your arm
while walking she wants
you to hold her hand

When she wants a hug
she will just stand there

When u break a girls heart,
she still feels it when
u run into each other 3 years later

When a girl is quiet,
millions of things are running through her
mind.

When a girl is not arguing,
she is thinking deeply.

When a girl looks at you with eyes full of
questions,
she is wondering how long you will be
around.

When a girl answers, "I'm fine, " after a
few seconds,
she is not at all fine.

When a girl stares at you,
she is wondering why you are so
wonderful.

When a girl lays her head on your chest,
she is wishing for you to be hers forever.

When a girl says that she can't live
without you,
she has made up her mind that you are
her future.

When a girl says, "I miss you, "
no one in this world can miss you more
than that

When a girl is mean to you after a breakup
she wants you back, but she's
scared she'll get hurt and knows
you're gone forever

When a girl has broken up with you becuase you were a jerk,

don't think its one of those "she wants me back" things, shes pretty much positive she doesn't want you back




Guy Facts:

When a guy calls you,
he wants to be with you

When a guy is quiet,
He's listening to you...

When a guy is not arguing,
He realizes he's wrong

When a guy says, "I'm fine, " after a few
minutes,
he means it

When a guy stares at you,
he wishes you would care about him and
wonders if you do

When you're laying your head on a guy's
chest,
he has the world

When a guy calls you everyday,
he is in love

When a (good) guy tells you he loves you,
he means it

When a guy says he can't live without you,
he's with you till your done

When a guy says, "I miss you, "
he misses you more than you could have
ever missed him or anything else



Post this as:

IF YOUR A GUY - "WHEN A GUY MISSES YOU"

AND

IF YOUR A GIRL POST IT AS - "WHEN A GIRL MISSES YOU"

so wow, i havent updated in well over a month (the sept 18th post was not really on sept 18th it was a mis-date). so classes have been going on for about a month now. my design studio and costume construction are going awesomely. history of styles i think is going well, we have a test in a week. english is going alright, i can't really tell. and then there is biology. first of all you should know that i got sick 2 weeks ago...i thought it was just a sinus cold, but then i got a real bad cough. i ended up going to the health center on the command of my boss/professor kathleen. it turns out i had bronchitis PNEUMONIA. suck. because i felt so crappy i ended up missing like a week and a half of biology. and we have a test on friday. im screwed. i have so much reading to do...but i dont seem to care. i just keep doing other things..non-productive things. i cant seem to get myself to study. i dont know. we'll see how it goes. maybe skimming through will be enough of a review from high school (probably not). so nothing else much new lately.

i feel as though something is missing from my life lately. i think i just am missing talking to my friend alex. i was used to talking to him at least on the phone regularly, but now it has been limited to maybe one or two internet convos a week since he's been in australia. i miss him.

i took a break from writing for a while, and now have lost my train of thought. so thats it for now.

so its been a long time since ive given a real update. ok, here it goes

The Play
we are no longer doing our production of "the nerd". we simply dont have the funds. we were supposed to be getting a loan from the original peter quince, but that got all messed up due to errors made by our public relations person. whatever. now, we're doing a night of improv, monologues, and selected scenes in order to raise money so that the same problem doesnt happen again next year. everyone should come. its the first thurs, fri, sat in august...the 4, 5 and 6 i believe. we'll probably sell concessions and whatnot. its cool i guess. i stopped the tech crew from getting to far so as not to waste time, though i feel we did. we pulled a bunch of props, including some pretty heavy stuff. i designed the set for us and we pulled all the flats we needed, and painted them the color we thought would look best with the furniture we picked out. oh well, some of the HSers wanted to clean and organize anyway, maybe it'll help. if anything, ms weyer has some clean slate hollywood flats to work with this upcoming year.

Work
i pretty much hate work right now. im fairly certain that some of the people i work with are incompetant lifeguards. they are generally OK people, but when you put them in the chair, or trying to teach a group of kids how to swim, im fairly certain they suck donkey balls. so it frustrates me to think that i can't trust some of the staff that i work with, and it also makes me a little bit nervous to work with them, especially at the outdoor pool where it is more important. i cant wait to start working up at school in the costume shop and at the evans/stewart desks. thatll be fun cuz ill finally see all my friends in oshkosh.

Life In General
as i said i want to be back in oshkosh. i want to get started with stuff in a new house with new roommates. i miss jaime and i miss bob and the rest of my theatre friends. granted, i have theatre friends up there, but quite often i find carter and myself telling stories of happenings from college theatre. i also miss my res life friends. im not very good at communicating over the phone, or even being diligent about it online, so seeing people everyday is a far better way for me to do it....thus making it hard to communicate with people from school. oh, alex left a week ago for australia. i talked to him right before he got on the plane...wished him a good flight and whatnot. i also talked to him for a bit last night, but because of the time difference he was in the middle of his day while i was trying to go to sleep after mine. so that was a short conversation. basically, he loves australia just as i thought he would. he has a picture of a dingo. jaime knows why that is funny. i turn 21 in a little over 6 weeks. im excited about that. itll be pretty much the weekend we're supposed to move in, but a few days before classes start, so i wont have to worry about getting up real early those first few days afterward, which is probably a good thing. i will probably have people over as well as join my res life friends at mollys and then probably bob and some theatre friends at some main street bars. itll be fun. jaime turns 21 in about 4 weeks, so thatll be fun as well. im hoping to take off work around that time to go up and see her. i have an early ass appointment next tuesday. i have to take my kitten Kona to the vet by 7am in tuesday. hopefully she weighs enough to get declawed. if she doesnt, i might clip her claws myself because shes starting to be slightly destructive and naughty in our house. but oh well, shes mighty cute.

hmmm, that was a fairly long entry and im sorry it jumped around so much. i was trying to keep it short and sweet. so until next time, adios.

so week number 1 in my new house is almost complete. i really like it here. i have my room all set up the way i like it. i have the closet half of my room and the living part of my room. i pretty much just stay in my room when im home. andy is still moving out and has stuff all over the house. he has to be out in a week though, so we'll see how that goes. one girl moves out on the 1st and one girl moves in. then the other two girls move in on the 4th or something. because all the stuff is in the house, ive been keeping kona shut in my room. i dont want her to break something or get somewhere in andy's stuff that she shouldn't be. i think she is getting kinda antsy, but once the others are moved in and andy is finished moving out, she can run around the houes all day as much as she pleases. but yea. its pretty cool being back. ive been working a bit at the theare...helping put everything back and cleaning stuff--they removed the espesthos out of the walls this summer and replaced a bunch of wall and ceiling and stuff...so everythig is out of place. so ive been doin that a few hrs a day. hmm, while im thinking of it, i should call a vet and make kona an appt to get the rest of her shots.

"Everchanging" by Rise Against

in the face of change
is when she turned to me and said,
"i'm not sure anymore..."
and there amidst the waves
and the cloudless skies
that blanket the year before
i watch my life wash ashore

have you ever been a part of something
that you thought would never end?
and then of course it did
have you ever felt the weight inside you
pulling away inside your skin?
and then something had to give

[Chorus:]
now the lines are drawn
is this feeling gone?
the best parts of this have come and gone
and now that is all this is
with the reasons clear
we'll spend another year
without direction, full of fear
and now things will be different

there's nothing simple when it comes to you and i
always something in this everchanging life
and it probably always will
now that time is getting harder to come by
the same arguments are always on our mind
we've killed this slowly fading light

[Chorus:]
now the lines are drawn
is this feeling gone?
the best parts of this have come and gone
and now that is all this is
with the reasons clear
we'll spend another year
without direction, full of fear
but now things will be different

now something has kept me here too long
and you can't leave me if i'm already gone
[x3]

make the same mistakes we're always hanging on
break the promises we're always leaning on
all this time spent waking up
(now i) keep this line open to get this call from you
(as you) speak the words that keep me coming back to you
now this time it's all different

now something has kept me here too long and now i'm gone...






i went for a drive w/ carter tonight. i like when we do that. we do it every few weeks or so, or take walks up at school. we just drive or walk and talk. its nice. i enjoy it. i dont know why.

i had a chlorine treatment for my hair from deb yesterday. fabulous! i love when i get those from her. it makes my hair so baby soft and smooth.

my ankle hurt. i sprained it last week on friday, for hte second time in a week. and i think the lack of movement from my ankle is creating cramps in the rest of my leg, which also hurt. i hope it starts getting normal again soon, but i dont think it will for a litlte while.

i move back to oshkosoh on saturday. im excited for that. and because Kona is MINE, i am taking her w/ me.

i went w/ carter, kait, and tirzah to see 'tick tick boom' tonight in fort atkinson. it was good. it is by jonathan larson, the same person who wrote rent. you could definately tell that they were written by the same person. they did a good job mostly except for their lead male. he didnt much know what to do w/ his arms and hands on stage. he wasnt the person originally picked to play the part. so yea.

im going to miss some people when i go back. especially kait king :)! i love you kait!